A new friend asked me that question a few months ago, and I started tearing up, because I realized that in the lunancy of life–working, tending to family, being a Gigantic Book Whore and the surprisingly difficult and time consuming task of making sure I had the right color lanyards for two very crafty 7-year-old girls–I hadn’t asked myself what makes me happy in way, way too long.
That question led to another question (AM I happy?) which led to a life inventory, which led to some renewed appreciation of what I have and have built and some adjustments, which I expect to be happymaking. If they are not, I hope to remember to ask myself that question again, and see what the answer yields.
It’s not rocket science (or even as hard as being a Gigantic Book Whore), and it invariably pays off big, but for whatever reason, I often forget to do it. In fact, putting it in my Google Calendar right this minute. Hopefully I won’t just blow off the beeping reminders, like I do the ones to go to the freakin’ gym already.
That’s why I’m glad my new friend Gretchen Rubin asked me that question (and what’s more, posted my answers on her fantastic blog that goes with her fantastic book, The Happiness Project). I admired her wildly successful book promotion from afar (Gigantic Book Whore, like Formerly Hot, is a designation only you can give yourself, but but both clubs are wholly nonexclusive) finally got to meet the lovely her.
Anyway, here is the the interview, and if I were you, I’d take the time to ask yourself that question. As for my answers, like everything else you do as a Formerly, take what works for you and donate the rest to Goodwill along with those jeans that don’t fit anymore, for all the good they’ll do you. There are plenty of other ideas on her site, and no doubt some of those will put a smile on your face.
August 26, 2010 at 9:24 am
Funny, I never ask myself this question, but rather sneak in from behind….
I ask myself, “Self? What makes you unhappy?”
By simply avoiding what makes me unhappy, and constantly running at 100mph, I think I stay pretty happy… I’ll have to ask myself, to make sure, but, I’ll wait until I’ve had a little bourbon to make sure I give an honest answer…
August 27, 2010 at 11:47 am
I will be happy when I’m done with alimony payments and my ex has to get a job if she wants to take her boyfriend to Vegas for the weekend.
August 28, 2010 at 1:25 pm
Ok, I have spent way too much time here today. I fouind you through an article you had published in MORE magazine.
HOW CLEVER YOU ARE!
I have been walking around feeling formerly hot, never realizing that’s the state I was in.
But you are right.
I love your blog, I love your writing, I am in deep like with you and your style.
SO happy about your book, and making things happen, and yes…I will be buying it and posting a review on it.
I am a small blogger, but do review books that I like now and then.
This one will hit home with my readers.
What a pleasure to meet you, I am so proud of how you have made something of this stage in your life with a book.
I remember once hearing, “if you can joke about it, then you still got it.”
SO, yeah, we can say formerly hot and laugh b/c we still have peeks out of it now and then. Like yesterday, when I was having breakfast with my 8 yr old son in McDonald’s and a man came over and asked me if I wanted a motorcycle ride. I just looked at him, and answered, “bless you for saying that, you’re going straight up for what you just did for this tired, old mom.”
Yup. He’ll be my blog post this week,
Pleasure to meet you, and so happy, too.
August 29, 2010 at 4:43 pm
I was following this when it was online before she made it into a book. I’ve been asking myself what makes me happy a lot these days. I recently wrote a post on simplifying and tossing out as much crap from my closets and drawers as possible. There is something so unburdening about filling up two Hefty trash bags full of junk and tossing it out. Now, I need to get rid of some old clothes and send them to Goodwill.
August 29, 2010 at 7:15 pm
Love Gretchen’s book and blog – and love your blog too (havent got your book yet, oops).
It sounds cliche, but now that I have passed gas — oops, passed 40 — happiness is spending time with the ones I love, my husband and friends and dogs. Calm and simple and pure.
On a more tangible basis, shutting oursevles in the basement beside the fire on a cold winter night, eating popcorn under the blanket curled up with the dogs and husband – that is bliss!