just think about how us mere mortals feel about this pesky passage of time thing. This from yesterday’s NY Post (which ran the above photo):
“Nothing ages as poorly as a beautiful woman’s ego,” says Paulina Porizkova, former Sports Illustrated swimsuit cover model, wife of rock star Ric Ocasek and one of the most recognizable faces of the 1980s.
“When you have used your beauty to get around, it’s like having extra cash in your back pocket. I was so used to walking down the street and having the young guys passing by at least give me a flicker of a look. But once you’re over 40, you become invisible. You’re a brick in the building and it’s sad. It just feels like the sun went down a little bit. It got a little cloudy outside.”
I’m sure she’s heard some version of, “Boo freakin’ hoo! You still look fantastic and anyway, you had a great run. Get over yourself.”
Yeah, OK, but I feel for her, having experienced just .000756% of what she’s going through, and admire that she’s talking about it. At no point in history would anyone have given me a cent to snap my picture, and even I’m feeling the loss. Her looks were her livelihood, her entire persona and the only thing (except for marrying a rock star) that she was known for and now, at 45, she feels they’ve gone the way of hair mousse and those God-awful high cut swimsuits. That’s gotta hurt.
I had my 25th high school reunion the other week, and classmates who know about this blog and my book said some variation of, “What do you mean? You’re still hot.” For which I thanked them, of course, and reciprocated the compliment before launching into my spiel about how this Formerly Hot thing is really not about looks so much as being moved into a different category of human being–that of the “not young” woman–without notice or permission. No matter what you look or looked like, there’s no escaping that things change.
Still, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t silently thrilled that the night of the reunion was one of those less and less frequent “on” days for me–the hair cooperated, I was on the thinner end of my 12 pound range and miraculously was not retaining Lake Michigan. In fact, everyone looked great–downright happy–so maybe the beauty gods shined their light-diffusing sparkle upon the entire Bronx Science class of 1985. My friend Julie remarked that the trick to feeling hot these days is to walk into a room of people in their 40s and simply never leave.
Maybe that would help Porizkova feel better? Hmmm…remind me not to be in that room when she shows up.
Photo by helayne seidman/Everett Collection (from the NY Post)
October 19, 2010 at 1:52 pm
Love this blog and have shared with others on my own site!
October 19, 2010 at 3:21 pm
“Boo freakin’ hoo” is right! “Don’t cry for me Porizkina…” Sorry, but no sympathy here. Do supermodels ever get old? Not if you’re Heidi Klum or Kate Moss..because even when their modeling days are over at the ripe age of 28, they increase their activity off the runway by designing their own fashion lines which keeps them in the spotlight, which keep them glamorous, which keep them from becoming a legitimate “formerly,”…in my opinion…But then, what do I know, I’m just a “meer mortal”;)
October 20, 2010 at 9:15 am
Not for the first time, I’m glad I’m not a super model. This is hard enough without losing my livelihood too.
I love your 12 pound range. When did we sink to the level of having a range??? But yeah, now I do.
October 21, 2010 at 9:18 am
The key is to hang out with women at least five years older than oneself. Sadly, that doesn’t guarantee looking better than the rest. It’s not a good day when a super model no matter the age feels unattractive and overlooked. The rest of us don’t have a chance.
October 21, 2010 at 12:06 pm
I actually think she looks better now, without the stupid hair and makeup and high-cut swimsuit. Now I look at her and see smart and funny, which gives her depth (I know that to be smart and funny she had to be that way all along, but it was obscured by the stupid extra-externals).
Also, I really liked your book!
October 21, 2010 at 1:32 pm
I would have explained, “Oh, no, sillies…Formerly Hot is just the name of the blog. I am fully aware that I’m still hot.” 🙂
October 22, 2010 at 8:54 am
While I could easily go for the Paulina bashing I am going to have to challange the “boo freakin’ hoo”. I think what Paulina describes is what we all experience with age and it doesn’t matter that she’ll look better at 60 than I did at 25. I’m glad you felt good at your reunion. I find it’s nice being with peopel your own age and also people you associate doing young and maybe less serious things with. My friends and I look at each other and say “how did this happen?” We all feel 20 still, well partially.
October 23, 2010 at 3:40 am
Only a super quick remark to say that your weblog isn’t showing correctly from my MAC when I’m surfing with iCab – i thought you might want to find out. It seems to be All right on Ie though
October 28, 2010 at 9:02 am
I love this blog and I can’t wait to read your book. I am only 34 but am very aware of my aging and the loss of identity as one person to another. I don’t care if people say I’m insecure, whatever. It’s not the issue… it’s another reality. So anyway, I think it must be really devastating to lose what you basically define yourself by (something I never wholly did). But which a model must. This reminds me of Karen Mulder who apparently went a little over the edge as she began to lose her looks and clearly needed psychological treatment. At least I’d read it had to do with her looks fading. Being a woman is difficult for the beautiful ones, too. I’m not too resentful to admit that.